Find Friends Who Value You for Who You Are

by Clare Hettich

Have you felt alone—even in a crowded bus or cafeteria? Have you thought you’re the only person on earth who has your interests, opinions, or struggles? Don’t worry: you’re never the only one. There are people out there who understand, so how can you find them?

If you feel like no one shares your interests…

  • Could you join a club? Joining a club related to one of your interests is a great way to make friends who share your passion. If your school doesn’t have the club you’re interested in, you might be able to find one in your area or online, with your parents’ support. 
  • Do you know any adults who might know about opportunities? If you’re passionate about animals, your dog’s vet might know of somewhere you can volunteer to meet other teens with this passion. If you love reading, your English teacher might recommend a book club you can join. And even if the person doesn’t have any ideas, connecting with her might already make you feel less alone!

If you feel like no one shares your values or beliefs…

  • Could you join a group that shares your beliefs? You can likely find a local group of teens who share your values. Many faiths offer youth groups where like-minded young people can both grow their faith and socialize.
  • Could you volunteer for a cause you feel passionate about? Working alongside other volunteers for a common cause is a great way to make friends who value the same things you do.

If you feel like no one shares your struggles…

  • Can you find a support group? There are groups both online and in person for teens who have suffered all different difficulties. Joining one is a great way to find healing and discover that you’re not alone.
  • Can you talk to someone honestly about how you feel? Of course, you shouldn’t share more than you’re comfortable with, but don’t be afraid to admit that you’re struggling with a difficulty or weakness. You might be surprised about how many people have the same feeling and just didn’t admit it.

Remember, you don’t need a friend exactly like you—all you need is someone who accepts you as you are.  If you seek out opportunities to meet new people, you’ll find someone who affirms you as you deserve.